Testimony of a Preacher Once Refuse Jesus With a Hard Heart for 6 Years

Zhou Gang
Zhou Gang (photo: Zhou Gang)
By Zhou GangSeptember 12th, 2016

No one can plan his life. I drew my own blueprint with ambitious ideals when I was a child. But the reality is not as nice as the ideal. I didn't have a concept of "preacher" at that time, but it's hard to imagine that I unexpectedly become a preacher now. That's indeed just as the Chinese old saying goes, "Things go to the opposite side of one's willing, but the thing someone don't want to experience and it just happens." 

The lot is cast into the lap, but its every decision is from the Lord(Proverbs 16:33) 

I was born in 1980s and is the only child in my family. My primary school, junior high school and high school education background which I experienced were just for achieving academic excellence, accomplishing both success and fame and making my ancestors illustrious.

When I was in junior high school, my mother wanted me to accept Jesus, but I determined to reject it. At that time I always thought there was no young people believe in Jesus. Why should I believe in him? What have I got to do with Jesus?

When I was about to study in high school, my mother still advised me to accept Jesus, but my resolve still didn't erode at all. I told my mother, "OK, if you want me to be a believer, wait until I'm old and my eyes are weak!" 

Until my college entrance examination ended and later, when I was waiting for the letter of admission, my mother came near to me and said thoughtfully, "I have advised you to accept Jesus for many times, and you refused again and again. It is not without reason and foundation I encourage you to believe in Jesus, today, I'll share with you God's amazing grace and works in our family. They are also the lively evidence present to you".

The First Witness: Before I accepted Jesus, I was in poor health. Until I accepted Jesus, I was completely cured by God, my mother said, "The Lord have delivered my soul from death, my eyes from tears, my feet from stumbling (Psalms116:5)" But for God's love, maybe I will not survive now, without God's grace, there is no hope in me today. God gives you a healthy mother, shouldn't you be grateful for that? Haven't you seen my health is much better than before?

The Second Witness: We felt it was so late when your father and I received Jesus as our Savior (They were about 40 years old at that time). You haven't experienced how hard the life is without Jesus. Our life was full of trouble and sorrow, without direction, without destination, it was just like a blind groped in the dark, sometimes we would stumbled and battered. So I don't want your life is also full of frustrations like ours'. It's much more important for you to believe in Jesus, because from infancy you have known the holy Scriptures, which are able to make you wise for salvation through faith in Christ Jesus.(2Timothy3:15) The Lord's word is a lamp to your feet and a light for your path. You can think, If there is a lamp to your feet and a light for your path, you will not be easily get stumbled and get hurt. If You grow up with God's blessings and grace, then your life will be full of peace and joy.

The Third Witness: If you, then, though you are evil,know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him(Matthew7:11)? My mother said, "If we are servants of a king, we will feel so proud for that. Today, we give you the biggest gift--Jesus Christ, and let you serve God, this will make us feel more glorious because the Lord rule over all thing in heaven and the earth. He is omnipresent, omniscient, omnipotence and he is the King of kings, Lord of lords.

After heard that, just in that moment, God tightly grasped my heart, I decided my mind to step into the way of serving his. I began to pray and read the Bible, I was just like the Chinese old saying goes "Pull full heart into Study(Bible) while turning a deaf ear to anything else". After I served him for 2 or 3 years,I felt frustrated and disappointed when I compared myself with others, I asked myself, "Why should I step into this way to serve Jesus? What benefit will this road bring to me?" But every time when I was about to gave up my faith, God disciplined me and flogged me. The relation between God and me are just as a shepherd look after his sheep, although the sheep are staying in a group, there are always some sheep disobedient, run away and damage the cultivated lands. Then the shepherd will flog it or beat it with stone to make it come back to the flock. So I drew some experience, learned from the past failures and knew that my life is in God's hand, wherever I go I will not flee from God's presence. I experienced more about the God and learned to be obedient. I offered my whole body to God and equipped myself for 4 years in the seminary. I gave my whole life to him and let myself be used by the Lord.

I have run for 13 years in the Lord's way. Just as lyrics in a Christian songs, "I cried, laughed, sang and kept silent, I walked, stopped, I have ever earnest, downhearted, I have walked through the lowest gorge, climbed the highest slope. Year after year, I have the disappointed moments, although I have suffered so much but still have some rewarding from God. The years like the blowing billow run through me, shedding a lot of tears with joy and sad. " God led me with ties of love. I have experienced God's grace and love. My ears had heard of God and now my eyes have seen him. After tasted and saw him, I know that the Lord is so good. Those who seek God lack no good thing. "My eyes and ears couldn't be satisfied until I have experienced him and I can gain Christ completely". I'm grateful for God's calling, choosing and working in me. It has always been my ambition that, "Preaching the truth is much more important than anything else in the world; spreading the Gospel is the most emergency thing than anything else in the world; I felt ashamed for spreading the good news before and was bored when running for Jesus; but now I feel so proud when doing that." Spreading the Gospel, saving the souls, that is my choice which I will never regret for doing that!

(The author is a seminary student from Litiao village church in Laiwu city, Shandong province. The passage's original title is "The most precious gift in my life--Jesus Christ")



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