How time flies! Six years have passes. When review the past, I didn't do well enough in my duty. If I let any one of you down, please accept my apology.
In the past 6 years, I have witnessed the ups and downs with brothers and sisters. We meet many difficulties at first, gradually, we have been more mature. I was comforted because of your longing for Truth and your love to Jesus. This is all Lord's grace, no one can boast.
It is God's love that connects us. How good and pleasant it is when brothers live together in unity! (Psalms133:1 Chinese Union Version) There is no church without problems, just as each family has its difficulties. Yet in Christ problem is not a problem since nothing is impossible in God.
In church, it is impossible to be serious in pursing idealism, because the church is a place gathering sinners, thus forgiveness and tolerance is necessary in any fellowships.
I choose to leave because the continuous inspire in my heart. After several days' prayer, I have the inner peace and seal of outer environment. My leaving is not just an impulse.
I have tried to follow my heart staying here without peace in my heart, although the economy, environment, education, and living conditions here are all very good, and many brothers and sisters have tried to persuade me to stay here. Some people even treat me in a rude manner, they thought I was so stupid. I understand their feelings, they did that for my benefit. I love you all!
I prefer your love can surpass emotions and be obedient to the holy spirit. There is no never-ending feast. You don't want me to leave because you love me. I don't want to separate with you, either! Don't I have emotions? You can see my hesitation, it is the most difficult choice in my life, but I cannot let you, I couldn't give up the love.
Can I disobey the spirit upon me? I can't find any move like the first time I came here. I have tried to seek, but I couldn't find it any longer, no matter by any means. I can only choose the firstly move in my heart and obey it. If not, I will be irresponsible for the Lord and the work in church. For it is God who works in you to will and to act according to his good purpose. (Philippians2:13)
Once more, my leaving is my own choice. I beg you that don't stir up dissension because of my choice. I'm very appreciate for brothers and sisters' recognition. I think all I have sufferd is not a big deal, not even worth mentioning. The church didn't treat me unfairly. God use the love, help, encouragement and comfort from you which never leave me.
Now please allow me to express my deep gratitude. May God bless you for what you have done. God loves me and he loves you more! Don't worry about me because of my leaving for He'nan, I will visit you in 2 or 3 years. God will prepare a good shepherd for Bantang church. Please don't be sad.
The reason I didn't say goodbye to you is that I'm afraid of seperation. I dare not to experience the parting scene, I don't want you to be sad because of seperation. I write this passage to say goodbye to you! Take care! Meet again some day! Emmanuel!
(The writer is a preacher in Bantang church, Bantang block Xiangtan city High-tech Zone in Hunan province)
